Jeff Dorris

Deliberations from Dorris

Jeff Dorris is the Editor of the Delta Dunklin Democrat


Kids say the darndest things...in church

Saturday, March 30, 2024

A few weeks ago I presented a column featuring funny excuses kids come up with for missing school.

It was a huge hit. I had many calls, texts, and emails from readers stating how much they enjoyed it.

Here’s another go at our children as they comment on church services.

A Sunday School teacher was telling the story of the Good Samaritan. She then asked the class, “If you saw a person lying on the roadside all wounded and bleeding, what would you do?”

A thoughtful little girl broke the silence, saying, “I think I’d throw up!”

A Sunday School teacher asked her preschool as they were on their way to the church service, “And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?”

One little girl replied, “Because people are sleeping.”

Here are few children’s prayers.

Dear God: Please help me in school. I need help in spelling, adding, history, geography, and writing. I don’t need help in anything else.

Dear God: I need a raise in my allowance. Could you have one of your angels tell my father. Thank you.

A wife invited some people to dinner.

At the table, she turned to their six year old son and asked, “Would you like to say the blessing?”

I wouldn’t know what to say,” replied the little boy.

Just say what you hear Mommy say,” the wife answered.

The son bowed his head and said, “Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?”

And finally, after the closing prayer a little boy exclaimed quite loudly, “Oh good. Now we can talk.”

Kids are precious.

Happy Easter to all.

See you out there.

Respond to this story

Posting a comment requires free registration: