Really, the computer ate it. Last week's column was all ready to go, but when time came to put the Sunday newspaper together it could not be retrieved from my laptop. Technology is great when it works.

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Rule 4- 4.

Maximum of 14 Clubs a. Selection and Addition of Clubs The player must not start a stipulated round with more than 14 clubs. He is limited to the clubs thus selected for that round, except that if he started with fewer than 14 clubs, he may add any number, provided his total number does not exceed 14.

The addition of a club or clubs must not unduly delay play (Rule 6-7) and the play­er must not add or borrow any club select­ed for play by any other person playing on the course < http://golf.about.com/cs/rulesofgolf/g/r ules_course. htm> .

Several folks felt it necessary to quote that rule last weekend on the local course.

Over the years we've chronicled the exploits of Steve Pu when it comes to his golf clubs. He's made the same New Year's resolution now for about the last 16 years, that I know of, claiming that his "bag is set" for the year. Attempting to make those who know him believe that he won't be trading any golf clubs during the year.

Apparently Steve isn't one of those people who suffer from a lot of guilt when it comes to broken resolutions.

Steve's resolution remains intact until the next issue of a golf magazine arrives in the mailbox.

After a layoff of several weeks -- I know that's hard to believe -- Steve finally got to play a round of golf. To say he strug­gled just a bit is an understatement.

According to the report I received, through the first nine holes, the usually straight and steady Steve saw parts of the golf he didn't even know existed.

When the group got ready to play the next nine they were only slightly sur­prised to see Steve's wife, Coleen, pull up in her vehicle. Seems Steve had called her for help. He had her go by his office and pick up a different set of clubs for him to use on the next nine holes. She dropped everything and rushed right out to get them for him.

There are a couple of different versions going around as to why Coleen moved so quickly, but we won't go into them here. Obviously changing clubs in the middle of the round is a violation of United States Golf Association's Rule 4-4a. The rule was mentioned to Steve but did not stop him for one moment. And adding clubs to get to the 14-club rule is never an issue with Steve. Most of us can't remember the last time he actually got down to only having 14 clubs in his bag.

A little later in the round it became apparent Steve's problems weren't the clubs. Let's just say he continued to struggle.

By the time the group got to the 17th tee one of Steve's playing partners, who shall remain name­less to protect the guilty, received a phone call. Brooks Golf Center in Jonesboro had received word of Steve's troubles and was shipping an emergency set of clubs to Steve. Alas, they did not arrive in time.

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Mailbag

From the virtual mailbag courtesy of Jim Reynolds and under the subject; Why Do We Love Children?

Opinions

On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his moth­er. The note read, 'The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.'

Ketchup

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her strug­gle the phone rang so she asked her 4­year-old daughter to answer the phone. 'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bot­tle.'

Police

While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, 'Are you a cop? Yes,' I answered and con­tinued writing the report. My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?' 'Yes, that's right,' I told her. 'Well, then,' she said as she extended her foot toward me, 'would you please tie my shoe?'

Death

While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin.

Feeling that proper burial should be per­formed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.

The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: 'Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes.' (I want this line used at my funeral!) SCHOOL A little girl had just finished her first week of school. 'I'm just wasting my time,' she said to her mother. 'I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!' * * *

Tops

"No company produces more steel in the United States than Nucor Corporation, according to the ranking published in the May 2008 issue of American Metal Market.

"The ranking by the magazine, its first in recent years track which company pro­duces the most steel on American soil.

"Nucor topped the list with more than 22 million tons. U. S. Steel was second with 16.8 million tons… Nucor is North America's largest recycler."

-- (Blytheville, Ar.) Courier News

Bud Hunt is the publisher of the Daily Dunklin Democrat.