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Thursday, Oct. 27, 2016

Empty Nester

Posted Monday, January 9, 2012, at 9:26 AM

I guess you could say my husband and I are empty nesters. Honestly, I don't like that term. I mean 'empty nesters' sounds like we live sadly alone and unhappy. The term 'empty nesters' refers to: "when children move away, mothers can get what is called "Empty Nest Syndrome", which is generally accepted as the lonely, abandoned feeling of the home being empty", according to Wikipedia. I think that definition is an example of gender discrimination, why doesn't it say "mothers and fathers can get......?

Our children are both in college and living on their own. With Christmas release they have been at home for several weeks. I really enjoyed the first week or so, then slowly but surely I begin to fade into a tired, sore and exhausted maid. We still have one child at home who will start back in a few days. Funny, my husband and I are secretly excited about them leaving. I know that sounds terrible but it's a tiring and draining situation. For example, grocery shopping doubles, cooking doubles, laundry doubles, late nights with lots of noise doubles. The door bell rings at all hours of the day and night, strange people are in the house.... Picking up and cleaning up after others doubles. The list actually go's on and on.

This holiday season both of my children were in car wrecks, and both in the same week. (Only one car was nearly totaled ....both kids are fine, by the way). On another occasion one of my children was going 85 mps in a 65 mph zone, only costs $20 per one mph over......grrrrrrr!!!! My calculations say that's about a $400 ticket, plus who knows what the increase in auto insurance will be. I really could add a few other sorted details but I might find myself homeless.....or emancipated from my children.

It is a bad thing to say, but I am kind of happy they are going back to school soon and for a nice three or four months! It really makes me smile too! I know you must think I am a terrible parent, but terrible or not...well its true. So the term "empty nester" is just plain wrong. I think we should change it to "happy nesters enjoying life after teens". Doesn't that sound better? Yes, I am so happy my kids are in college and living on their own! Yes, I am happy they are somewhat independent and getting an education!! And yes, I am happy to be an "empty nester" regardless of the term.

PS...please don't write me and tell me I am a bad parent. This is mostly written to be funny and not serious....just don't ask me which is which!

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This is somewhat a relief to read; my husband and I will be empty nesters after this school year and neither of us are looking forward to it. We can't imagine our lives no longer revolving around our daughter's abundance of activities. I assumed after a while we might actually enjoy being "home alone" but right now it is something we are not looking forward to. At least this is hope that there may come a day that not only am I ok with it, but excited about it!

Thanks for your honesty!

-- Posted by concerned on Wed, Feb 22, 2012, at 12:16 PM

There is always hope!

It was not easy for me at first. My son was the first to leave home for college. And even though he was just an hour away, I really did miss him. I tried to visit him whenever he wanted me too. He loved school so the fact that he was happy did help.

Two years later my daughter left for college. Now I was offically home alone. I did struggle. But I tried to find time to do the things I had put off for years. Staying busy, helping others really did help. Planning fun day trips for me and my husband helped pass time too.

My children have been in college now for several years, when they are home, its a great time for family. I tease a lot in my blog, but it really is fun. Keep me posted and I will pray for your child and for you. God Bless you!!

-- Posted by cbhine on Wed, Feb 22, 2012, at 3:29 PM

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